We all collapsed early last night after a nice dinner at the hotel. We were all just too tired to go out. However, Herb and I woke up at 1:30 wide awake - we both ended up doing email and reading for a bit. Fortunately both of us fell back asleep around 4 or so and Hannah and Ben got us up at 6:30 - we are really hoping we can sleep completely through a night soon!
So, with an early start, a nice breakfast we waited in the lobby for our guide, Eric, and Ben's foster mother, Mrs. Wang - who was to meet us and join us driving back to Ben's orphanage. She came into the hotel right on time, before Eric got there. She came with her husband - we knew so little about her from 10 years ago, we didn't even know she was married. It turns out she is 57, has a 30 year old son and a 3 year old granddaughter. She retired from the orphanage in 2003. Our guide Eric joined us shortly after she arrived and was able to translate for us. She was so thrilled to see Ben. She was very emotional and really teared up many times during the day. Ben was very happy to meet her and a bit curious about her, but sincerely, I believe it was much more meaningful for her to meet Ben as a grown child. Ben has no memory of her of course and she remembers him well. When we were talking we asked her how many children had she taken care of when she worked at the orphanage. It turns out that she only took care of Ben and Eu-Meh (who was adopted the same time as Ben and we still see her as she lives in Baltimore). We had assumed that she foster-mommed many children - but no, only those two. Not only did she take care of Ben, but one month before we came to China to get Ben, she started taking Ben home at night so he got more used to living away from the other children. It was very clear that she remembered Ben well and there was an attachment and she was so touched that we had brought him back, and that she could spend the day with him.
One of the things that we did before we left for China was to load about a 7 minute movie onto Herb's computer. This was our original movie of the moments that Ben was put into our arms. Mrs Wang was in the movie and was holding Ben and handed him to us - she was crying, we were crying...and so we did it again... 10 years later. She seemed to appreciate seeing this bit of our shared history. We also (when I say we in these cases, we are talking about Herb, not me) scanned and printed the photo album which had our adoption trip - and every picture of the time we had together. She loved seeing this as well. After about 30 minutes of getting re-acquainted, we took off for the "orphanage" which was about a 45 minute drive. Now, the orphanage where Ben spent the first year of his life is no longer an orphanage. When Ben was there, it not only had children, but elederly and disabled people of all ages. Ben was the 4th child adopted out of this orphanage, and was the first boy adopted out of the orphanage and of Heilongjiang provence. The total number of adoptions of out this orphanage were only 50! That was a big surprise to us. In 2003 Mrs. Wang actually retired (mandatory retirement in China is 50 for "common" workers (!!). The orphanage stopped caring for children in this same year. There is a new orphanage in Harbin where now there are about 300 children. However, we wanted to see and to show Ben where he spent the first year of his life.
In many ways, the orphanage was very much the same and in others it was quite different. Where there was a parking lot behind the main building 10 years ago - they had created a basketball court, a garden with a waterfall and some playground equipment for children visiting their family. They took us into the exact same conference room we visited when we visited the orphanage two days after we adopted Ben. This time, like last they served us watermelon, cold drinks and took lots of pictures themselves.
What I found interesting was the Director - who was the Assistant Director 10 years ago asked us if there was something we "wanted" or questions we had. We were not exactly sure what she meant by that, but we assume that she thought we were seeking any information that may be available about Ben's biological parents. Of course, we knew there weren't any since he had been found at the Harbin train station and there was no note or information left with him. We explained that we only wanted Ben to see where he spent the first year of his life and to introduce him to the people who cared for him- we were not seeking anything more. She was just lovely, asked us questions and was also very interested to see the movie and pictures. She gave us commerative books that were created in 2008 that celebrated teh 50 year anniversary of the Harbin Social Welfare Institute. (the old orphanage included). She then gave us a tour of Ben's old room (which was cut into smaller rooms that houses residents now). that was pretty much the entire event! Here are a few pictures from this part of the day. More soon!
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